Somewhat Humorous Column

These New Ads Have Got To Go! 

(Published in The Auburn Plainsman on October 12, 2006)

        What’s your War Eagle Moment? I’m sure we’ve all seen them before. I only know of two of these commercials so far, but I just can’t take them anymore. The first one is set in an airport. A man wearing an AU shirt is apparently stressed out about missing a flight. Another man, wearing a suit and pin sees this forlorn stranger and instinctively says “War Eagle” to him. This brightens his day, and suddenly he seems unconcerned whether he misses his flight or not.

            The other setting is Yellowstone National Park with cheesy music in the background. Everyone has black and boring umbrellas as they watch the Old Faithful geyser do its reliable thing. There is one family using their trusty Auburn umbrella however. Out of nowhere, another family with their own orange and blue umbrella sees a familiar emblem and sets out to meet the kindred spirits. “War Eagle, y’all,” they say as the other family perks up saying, “Hey! War Eagle,” back.

            The first time I saw them, I thought they were strictly local. I wouldn’t have minded them if they had been, but someone decided they were going to be our recruitment commercials for nationally televised games. While other schools tell everyone how statistically great they are, we tell the country that all we have is a cool battle cry or catch phrase.

            Now I’ll admit that I’ve had my own moments far from campus. If I didn’t I attend this school though, I would have no idea what it in the world it meant. Most probably end up thinking that it's some kind of inside joke. We are inadvertently demeaning ourselves in my mind. These ads aren’t professional enough, and probably don’t make much sense to outsiders.

            There is plenty to be proud about at Auburn. The U.S. News & Report ranks it as one of the top fifty public institutions in America and the best in the state. It's been rated one of the “best values” in America by the Princeton Review. Auburn’s twelve colleges and schools have earned outstanding distinction and recognition.

            A lot of colleges are making commercials about how they are contributing to the future and why they matter in the whole scheme of things. Sponsored research totals $100 million annually here. Auburn is one of six universities selected by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security to provide experts for a think tank. Among other things, it is one of the leaders in researching how to provide a reliable fuel source to replace expensive gas.

            I just don’t see why we advertise ourselves in such a way, is it out laziness? There are so many other commercials they could make. The game against Florida will be a Saturday night event, the entire nation will be watching. I don't think I'm the only one who hopes a new commercial is made soon.